sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
