ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
