so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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