Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
