I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
two words: eviction party
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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