So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
