My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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