The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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