No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
