I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
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