the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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