I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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