When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
