What a fucking waste of an outfit
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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