We're facebook friends in real life
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize