she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
We're too hungover to prance.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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