dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
