just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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