How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Randomize
