plz talk dirty to me
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
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