Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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