They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
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My dream of liquor pitchers came true
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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