If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
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