He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
