I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
