note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
This is my gift to your gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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