By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
