would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
