You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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