She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
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It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
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I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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