Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
