i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
