well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize