I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I currently don't understand fingers.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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