Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
