I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
where does the pee come out of this thing
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
