I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
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The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
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OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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