it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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