Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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