yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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