I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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