TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
