We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
