DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I want you more than these girls want KFC
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
