After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
