Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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