he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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