5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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