so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
