Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Dear god my vagina.
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